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When Your Mind Can’t Catch a Break: How Do You Rest When Your Thoughts Never Stop Racing?

There’s a kind of tiredness that doesn’t show on your face. You go to work. You show up. You laugh with people. You move through the motions. But inside your head—it’s chaos. There’s the to-do list. The bills. The unspoken fears. The small, constant calculations. The weight of everyone else depending on you. The pain you never had time to process. The dreams that quietly died in the background.

You sleep, but you’re not rested. You take a weekend off, but your mind is still sprinting. You sit down to rest, and your brain opens a spreadsheet of everything that could go wrong.

That’s not just stress. That’s mental exhaustion.

The Storm We Don’t Realize We’re In

In Kenya, we’ve normalized mental fatigue so much that we barely notice it anymore. You're in your 30s or 40s, and it hits you: you’ve been running for two decades straight. Not just physically—but emotionally, financially, mentally.

A single mother works two jobs but still finds herself sleepless at 3 a.m., not because of the baby, but because her mind is calculating how to cover rent, shopping, and school fees next term.

A boda boda rider hears a loud bang and flinches—not because anything happened—but because of the PTSD from surviving an accident three years ago and never affording counselling.

A government employee is quiet in meetings, not because he lacks ideas, but because his brain is fried from worrying about medical costs for his parent, school issues for his child, and whether his contract will be renewed.

Mental exhaustion is silent. But it is powerful. And if we don’t name it, it quietly unravels us.

Signs of Mental Exhaustion (That We Ignore)

  • You’re constantly tired, even after sleep.

  • You snap at people you care about and regret it almost instantly.

  • You can’t focus—your attention drifts no matter how urgent something is.

  • You're always anxious. Always alert. Like something could go wrong any moment.

  • You’ve lost interest in things you used to enjoy.

  • You’re overwhelmed by small tasks: replying to messages, cooking, calling people back.

  • You feel numb. Not sad. Not happy. Just… flat.

  • You find yourself fantasizing about disappearing—not dying—but just stepping away from everything.

How Do You Rest When You’re Still in the Storm?

Let’s be real: telling people to “rest” when they’re in a crisis can feel insensitive.

How do you rest when your water has been disconnected, when your relative is sick, when rent is due and your pay slip has already been claimed by Fuliza, school fees, and Sacco loans?

But maybe we need to rethink what rest looks like in these moments. It doesn’t have to be a week off in Naivasha. It doesn’t have to be a full reset.

Sometimes, rest is survival with softness.
It is saying: Even though I’m fighting, I can breathe here.

Here’s what that might look like, even in the storm:

  • Mental boundaries: Stop overthinking what you can’t control. Limit conversations that only add pressure.

  • Micro-moments: Five minutes of silence before the chaos starts. Listening to music while washing clothes. Walking without your phone.

  • Letting some things wait: Not everything is urgent. Truly. Postpone the non-essential where possible.

  • Speaking it out: Saying “I’m not okay” to someone you trust. Sometimes the pressure lifts when it's shared.

  • Refusing guilt rest: If you find one hour to rest, take it. You don’t have to “earn” that hour.

What Happens If We Ignore It?

Mental exhaustion has a quiet cost. The longer we ignore it, the heavier the consequences:

  • Burnout: Not just tiredness, but a complete collapse in energy and motivation.

  • Health issues: Headaches, ulcers, high blood pressure, insomnia.

  • Damaged relationships: We become irritable, withdrawn, or emotionally unavailable.

  • Financial mistakes: We make desperate or impulsive choices because we can’t think clearly.

  • Emotional numbness: We stop caring—not because we’re bad people, but because we have nothing left to give.

But What If You’re Not Lazy, Just Tired?

There’s a lie many of us have believed: that if we’re not constantly productive, we’re failing.

But what if your body isn’t betraying you—what if it’s warning you?

You can’t pour from an empty jug. You can’t carry everyone forever. And you don’t have to be broken to ask for a break.

Simple Ways to Start Resting the Mind

You don’t need a 10-step routine. You just need one small opening:

  • Drink your tea slowly—in silence.

  • Sit in the sun for 10 minutes and breathe deeply.

  • Let a chore go undone for the day.

  • Text a friend and say, “I need a laugh, send me something funny.”

  • Listen to a calming song on loop.

  • Cry, journal, pray—whatever helps your mind feel lighter.

Final Thought

The world won’t collapse if you rest. But you might—if you don’t.

Mental rest is not the absence of struggle. It’s the presence of peace inside the struggle.
Even when the storm is raging—you can still choose small pauses.
You can still be gentle with yourself.

Because your mind matters. Even when no one else sees it.

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