When the Storm Passes and We Keep Running: Why Kenyans Struggle to Be Still

There’s a kind of grief we rarely speak about in Kenya—the grief that comes not from loss, but from survival.

Many Kenyans know what it’s like to give up entire decades of their lives for the sake of family. We raise children who aren’t ours. We care for ageing, ailing parents when healthcare fails. We build homes from scratch while still repaying loans. We battle court cases over family land, support siblings through school, and somehow still show up to work, church, harambees, and funerals with a smile.

We are excellent at pushing through pain. We endure. We provide. We hold everything together.

And so we often tell ourselves: “I’ll rest when I’m done.” But what if done never comes?

Even after the chaos ends—the illness, the debt, the heartbreak—we don’t rest. We move the goalpost. We chase another opportunity. We dream of new lands and new starts. We keep running, because stillness feels foreign.

We are a nation that knows how to hustle, how to survive—but we don’t know how to rest. We’ve turned sacrifice into a virtue and struggle into our default setting. Somewhere along the line, we started equating stillness with laziness, peace with complacency, and healing with weakness.

And so we keep running. Even after the storm. Even after the war is over. We keep building new battles to fight, because rest feels foreign. Because joy feels indulgent. Because stopping to breathe feels like wasting time.

But at what cost?

How many Kenyans live their whole lives on the edge of burnout, waiting for a peace they’re too scared to embrace? How many of us are carrying pain that should’ve been laid down years ago? How many homes have become prisons of memory? How many jobs are just distractions from grief?

But here's the truth: rest is not the end of ambition. It is the beginning of clarity.

How Do You Know It’s Time to Pause?

Sometimes the hustle needs to be put on hold—not because you’re weak, but because you’re human. Here are some signs that it might be time to stop pushing and start breathing:

1. When the goalpost keeps moving.

You promised yourself you’d slow down after buying a car. Then it became land. Then a house. Then another plot.
🎯 Pause and ask: When is “enough” actually enough? Can I enjoy what I have, just for a moment?

2. When the money isn’t buying peace.

Your income increased, but so did the stress. You’re always tired, always worried.
💡 Try: Blocking one weekend a month to unplug. Budget for joy—not just bills. Even a quiet afternoon nap counts.

3. When your body starts whispering.

Back pain. Headaches. Sleepless nights. You ignore the signs because there’s no time.
🛑 Reframe it: Your body is your lifelong home. Treat it like a long-term investment.

4. When family feels like strangers.

You’re working hard “for them,” but you don’t know your child’s favorite snack or your partner’s current stress.
👣 Try: Scheduling real, uninterrupted time together. Not expensive trips—just being present.

5. When the chase feels meaningless.

You’re climbing, but you’ve forgotten why. The promotion, the side hustle, the name—it all feels hollow.
❓ Ask yourself: Would I still be doing this if nobody clapped?

So, How Do We Rest—Practically?

Not everyone can afford a vacation. But rest isn’t just about money—it’s about intention. Here are simple, affordable ways to rest and reconnect with yourself:

Say “no” to one thing this week—a gig, a request, a conversation that drains you.
Create a quiet corner in your home, even if it’s just a seat by the window with a cup of tea.
Rest your mind. Take a break from your phone. Journal your thoughts. Listen to music—without multitasking.
Practice micro-joys. Walk barefoot on grass. Re-read a book. Watch the sky. Breathe deeply.
Learn the art of “enough.” Celebrate small wins. You don’t need to announce them. Just enjoy them.

We need to teach ourselves, and each other, how to pause. To take joy seriously. To sit in silence without panic. To build homes not just from concrete, but from peace. To stop looking for new storms to prove our strength.

We survived. That’s no small thing. But now we must learn how to live.

🧘🏾‍♀️ Mantra for the Day:

“Rest is not the end of ambition. It is the beginning of clarity.”

"Rest is not a reward for the finished work—it’s part of the work."

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