If You Think Having Uncomfortable Conversations Is Hard, Wait Until You See the Results of Not Having Them

Kenyans have mastered the art of silence. We call it ‘moving on,’ but what we’re really doing is running away—from pain, from history, from accountability. We tell ourselves that forgetting is the same as healing, that ignoring problems makes them disappear. But our silence has a cost, and that cost is becoming unbearable.

"Peace isn’t just the absence of war; it’s the presence of justice."

Post-Election Violence: The Wound That Never Heals

After every election cycle, we hold our breath. We whisper prayers for peace. But peace isn’t just the absence of war; it’s the presence of justice. And justice requires truth.

The 2007/2008 post-election violence left more than 1,100 dead and over 600,000 displaced. We never really talked about it. Instead, we got a political handshake, a commission whose report was buried, and a new government that told us to ‘accept and move on.’ The perpetrators walk free. The victims still wait for justice. The same tensions simmer beneath the surface, ready to explode with the next election. Because when wounds are left untreated, they don’t heal—they fester.

Right now, the cost of food is skyrocketing, corruption continues unchecked, and political leaders are recycling the same empty promises. But here’s the truth—change starts with us. If we don’t demand accountability, we will once again be back here in 2027, hoping and praying that the country does not burn.

"We inherited a system designed to oppress us and continued running it as if nothing happened."

Colonial Trauma: Three Generations of Silence

We are the third generation after colonialism, yet the trauma lingers. Land was stolen, ancestors were brutalized, entire communities were displaced. But have we ever sat down as a country to address it? Instead, we inherited a system designed to oppress us and continued running it as if nothing happened.

The British left, but their ghosts stayed behind—in our education system that still glorifies them, in our laws that prioritize property over people, in our police force that was built to brutalize and still does so today. We never demanded reparations. We never demanded accountability. Instead, we let history be rewritten in their favor, and we silence anyone who dares to bring it up.

Today, we are watching history repeat itself. Western interests dictate our economy through predatory loans, foreign corporations take over local industries, and land grabbing continues as if independence never happened. But we are not powerless. We can demand transparency in how public resources are used, we can support leaders and businesses that prioritize Kenyan interests, and we can start conversations about economic independence in our communities.

"Silence is the foundation of generational trauma."

The Family Silence That Destroys Lives

It’s not just national issues—we avoid hard conversations even in our own homes. How many families have been torn apart because land disputes were never discussed until it was too late? How many children have suffered under abusive parents because ‘hiyo ni mambo ya ndani?’ How many people are trapped in marriages that should have ended years ago, because divorce is ‘shameful?’

Silence is the foundation of generational trauma. A father refuses to talk about his struggles, so his son learns to bottle up his pain. A mother suffers in silence, so her daughter grows up thinking suffering is normal. We pass down these wounds like heirlooms, until someone finally breaks the cycle. Let that someone be you. Speak up. Seek help. Change the script for the next generation.

"Ignoring these issues doesn’t make them go away—it makes them worse."

Gender, Mental Health, and the Cost of Suppression

How many Kenyan men suffer in silence because ‘wanaume hawalii?’ How many women stay in toxic relationships because ‘ndoa ni kuvumilia?’ How many young people battle depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts because we refuse to acknowledge mental health as a real issue?

We don’t talk about sex, but teenage pregnancies are everywhere. We don’t talk about LGBTQ+ issues, but violence against them is on the rise. We don’t talk about consent, but our courts are flooded with rape cases. Ignoring these issues doesn’t make them go away—it makes them worse.

If you are struggling, reach out. If you see someone suffering, listen without judgment. If you have a platform, use it to raise awareness. We all have the power to create change, no matter how small.

What Can Every Kenyan Do?

1. Break the Silence – Speak up about injustices, no matter how uncomfortable. Change begins with open and honest conversations.

2. Demand Accountability – Question leaders, push for transparency, and refuse to be pacified by empty promises.

3. Educate Yourself and Others – Learn our real history, understand the systems in place, and share that knowledge.

4. Support Those Who Speak Out – Many who speak up face threats, harassment, and economic consequences. Stand in solidarity with them.

5. Be Part of the Solution – Get involved in community projects, vote responsibly, support ethical businesses, and uplift others.

6. Change Starts with You – Be the kind of person who listens, who questions, and who refuses to pass down the same traumas to the next generation.

"Speaking up has consequences, but silence is far deadlier."

The Price of Our Silence

We think avoiding hard conversations keeps the peace, but in reality, it’s planting the seeds of future chaos.

Every unresolved issue is a ticking time bomb. Every unspoken truth is a wound that refuses to heal. But here’s the good news: we have the power to change this.

We must talk. We must listen. We must act. No effort is too small, and no voice is insignificant. Because the alternative—the Kenya we are creating through silence—is far worse.

So, what will you do today?