What Success Looks Like In Kenya VS. What It Actually Is

One of the easiest things in the world is to mistake an outcome for a story. A beautiful home. A thriving business. A failed marriage. A child in an expensive school. A forty-year-old with no savings. Someone who seems to have it all. Someone who appears to have fallen behind. We see the destination and instinctively begin filling in the journey. Hardworking. Lazy. Disciplined. Irresponsible. Lucky. Entitled. Deserving. Wasteful. Perhaps the most dangerous thing about human beings is not that we judge one another. It is how quickly we become certain that our judgment is correct. Because every life has invisible expenses. Not just financial ones. The kind that never appear on a bank statement or a résumé. Some are chosen. Some are imposed. Some are wise. Some are costly mistakes. Most are a complicated mixture of both. One person reaches middle age with very little savings because they spent years paying school fees for younger siblings. Another because they repeatedly made poor financi...

What Success Looks Like In Kenya VS. What It Actually Is

If you ask most Kenyans what success looks like, you’ll get a variety of answers, but somehow, they always boil down to three things: money, cars, and land. A Toyota Prado, a ka-small ka-mansion in the village, and the ability to pepper conversations with "I was in Dubai last week"—that’s success, right? But is it really?

Here’s a breakdown of what many Kenyans think success is and what real success looks like in different aspects of life.

1. SUCCESS IN FAMILY & COMMUNITY

What Kenyans Think:

Hosting a big wedding where people eat for three days.
Being called "Baba/Mama Nani" even when your kids don’t know what you do for a living.
Your family showing up at every funeral, wedding, and hospital harambee just to be seen.

What It Really Is:

Being present for your kids—not just paying their fees but actually knowing their teachers.
Raising children who don’t just wait for your burial to start fighting over land.
Being that relative people can actually call when they need guidance, not just money.

The Lesson: If your children only see you as a cash cow, you haven’t built a family; you’ve built an expense.

2. SUCCESS IN CAREER & BUSINESS

What Kenyans Think:

Being the CEO of "Something & Sons Ltd" even if the business is struggling.
Dressing like you own the bank while your loan officer is chasing you down.
Having a title at work that impresses, even if you hate your job.

What It Really Is:

Having a career or business that allows you to sleep peacefully at night.
Building a business that doesn’t need you there every second to survive.
Not living in silent misery because of a job you hate but are too scared to leave.

The Lesson: If you spend 40 years working only to retire and start life afresh, was it worth it?

3. SUCCESS IN HEALTH & WELL-BEING

What Kenyans Think:

Going to the gym for two weeks and posting "No pain, no gain."
Eating nyama choma daily but taking Green Tea to "flush toxins."
Having health insurance but never going for check-ups.

What It Really Is:

Going for regular medical check-ups before a problem arises.
Actually resting—success is not overworking yourself into an early grave.
Taking care of your body so you don’t become the subject of a medical harambee in your 40s.

The Lesson: If your success is leading to high blood pressure and hospital visits, maybe it’s time to rethink it.

4. SUCCESS IN PERSONAL GROWTH

What Kenyans Think:

"I don’t have time for books, I’m too busy chasing the bag."
Attending every motivational talk but never actually applying anything.
"Hustle culture" to the point where you have no hobbies, no joy, no life.

What It Really Is:

Growing in wisdom, self-awareness, and emotional intelligence.
Knowing how to say "Hapana, siwezi" without guilt.
Understanding that your worth is not tied to how much money you make.

The Lesson: If your bank account is growing but your peace of mind is shrinking, is that success?

5. SUCCESS IN SOCIAL IMPACT & LEGACY

What Kenyans Think:

Giving donations in public and making sure there’s a cameraman.
Building a school and naming it after yourself.
Being "known" even if no one actually respects you.

What It Really Is:

Helping people in a way that truly changes their lives, even if no one sees it.
Leaving behind something meaningful, not just buildings and plaques.
Raising kids who will not undo in five years what took you 50 to build.

The Lesson: If your success dies with you, was it really success?

FINAL THOUGHTS: RETHINKING SUCCESS

Success in Kenya has been sold to us as cars, houses, and making it to the ‘rich men’s WhatsApp group.’ But the reality is, true success is about balance. It’s about having money and time, respect and peace, wealth and wisdom.

Because at the end of the day, a mansion in Runda doesn’t mean much if no one in your home is happy, just like a loaded bank account doesn’t matter if the only people who will enjoy it are the lawyers fighting over your inheritance.

Moral of the Story: Success is not what people see—it’s what you feel when you wake up in the morning.

What does success look like to you?

The Great Kenyan Home Ownership Madness: Dreams vs. Reality

Owning a home is a big dream for many Kenyans, but somewhere along the way, practicality has been thrown out the window. Too many people, driven by childhood aspirations or societal expectations, are constructing massive houses only to end up living like misers within them. Let’s break down why this trend makes little sense and what smarter, more sustainable homeownership looks like. The Harsh Reality of Owning a Big House in Kenya Many Kenyans, especially those who grew up in humble backgrounds, grew up being told to “dream big.” Unfortunately, this has translated into building unnecessarily large houses, often with rooms that remain unused, multiple verandahs gathering dust, and massive balconies that no one actually sits on. These houses cost millions to build, yet within a few years, the owners are struggling to maintain them, regretting their choices as they pour more money into renovations. If you need proof, just look at how many old houses in Nairobi remain unsold. No one wants...

Daniel Arap Moi — The Shadow and the Shepherd: A Deep Dive into Kenya’s Second President

If Jomo Kenyatta was the founding father, Daniel Toroitich Arap Moi was the long-reigning stepfather — sometimes protective, often punitive, and almost always enigmatic. He ruled Kenya for 24 years, the longest of any president to date. To some, he was the gentle teacher, Mwalimu , who kept the nation from tearing apart. To others, he was the architect of a surveillance state, a master of patronage and fear, the man who perfected repression through calm. This is a portrait of Daniel Arap Moi — not just as a ruler, but as a man shaped by modest beginnings, colonial violence, and the hunger for order in a chaotic time. Early Life: The Boy from Sacho Daniel Arap Moi was born on September 2, 1924, in Kurieng’wo, Baringo, in Kenya’s Rift Valley. He came from the Tugen sub-group of the Kalenjin community. His father died when he was just four. Raised by his uncle, Moi’s early life was marked by hardship, discipline, and deep Christian missionary influence. He trained as a teacher at Tambach ...

Know Thyself: The Quiet Power of Naming Your Nature

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” — Carl Jung We live in a culture that equates good intentions with goodness, and ambition with ability. But very few people in Kenya—or anywhere—truly know what they are made of. We can name our qualifications and our dreams. But ask someone their vices or virtues, and they hesitate. Worse, they lie. The Danger of Self-Unawareness In Kenya today, many of us are wandering through life making choices—big, small, and irreversible—without truly understanding who we are. We end up in jobs we despise, relationships we shouldn’t be in, or positions of influence we aren’t emotionally or ethically equipped for. And at the root of this dysfunction is a simple truth: we don’t know ourselves. This is not a spiritual or abstract dilemma. It’s a deeply practical one. To know oneself is to understand your vices, your virtues, your weaknesses, and your strengths—not in a vague sense, but in detail. Let’s ge...

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Every Life Has Invisible Expenses